...

Well hi again. It's been a bit.

School is, mercifully, done with. Now I await the grades.

I've attempted to write a couple of posts before this. Perhaps, at some point, they shall be published. Maybe not. They're a bit graphic and miserable.

I think that's a weird contradiction I've been met with, recently. Quite a few people I've talked to would say that I'm a generally pleasant person. I suppose that I would certainly hope so— it's taken a lot of practice.

Not to say I consider myself a generally miserable person. I just find that if left to drop the mask, I'm a terribly boring person that happens to do interesting things on occasion. I keep to myself, talk little unless it's about something I feel passionate over.

I have to click over to another setting; find my scripts and well-rehearsed vocal tones. It's not my goal to bring more unkindness and genuine misery into the world.

I can't say I loathe other people. There are many I don't. I do, in fact, attempt to see the good amongst the flaws. Despite the last few months being a period of jarring disconnection in regards to my perception, I've found many avenues of human connection in the last year.

The approaching end of the year brings, for many, a time of reflection. To a certain degree, I can relate. However, I feel as though I spend a good portion of my time reflecting on the person I've been. The things I've done.

I attempt to approach everything these days with a sense of gratitude. I'm lucky to have made it halfway towards 30. Each year that passes is another where I feel relieved I'm still alive.

I would argue this has been my most spiritual year as a whole. It brings to mind a time in my teen years where I attempted to explore a type of witchcraft. Now, I find myself skeptical in regards to the whole ordeal. I take everything not given from a practiced, verified resource with the finest grains of salt.

I believe in things like energy work. To a certain degree, manifestation. I believe that deities may find you when you need them, but not expect you nor themselves to overstay the welcome.

It's all one giant conversation. Formality isn't a necessity, in some regards. That's how I like to practice mine. Practical magic.

I wear an onyx stone often. Sometimes, I switch it for a garnet. I would consider myself a person that needs reminders of strength, of protection. Small boosts of confidence and sureity.

But then again— who's to say that all of that doesn't just come from myself. My own inner wells. It doesn't discount the religion of it all, though.

Perhaps it's time I explore what it might mean to be a witch, again.

Or maybe not. I've never loved hard-and-fast labels anyway.